Team
Team is the second installment of Season 01 and the second episode overall. It was written and directed by Tomdylanwow. The first part was released in September 3rd, 2016. The second part was posted later on the same day. PART 1 Everyone is still shocked about the Grace murder. REGINA: Oh my god, I can't beli-- Sister slaps the shit out of Regina. SISTER: DON'T SAY THE LORD'S NAME IN VAIN BITCH! ANGELA: I'LL INTRODUCE MY FRIENDS TOO YOOUUUU CLAIRE (to Nanette):''' Is she always like this? '''NANETTE: Bitch, you have no idea. ANGELA: Shut up whores, my dad found a rock from space! BOBBY: Guys, wait... MANDY: Ugh, I need my meth. CRIM: Same, to be honest. BOBBY: Grace said Tom had the keys. Let's hide her body and get the fuck out of here! TOM: Oh my god, I completely forgot! SISTER: So we are leaving? Sister takes Grace's wallet and starts stealing other things. Tom searches his coat. TOM: Fuck, the killer must have stolen the keys! AMY: We need to figure out who the killer is! DEPUTY: Bitch don't make me chop you up and smoke you. AMY: What the actual-- REGINA: Which is why, I propose we split up in teams of three! SISTER: Even Judas wouldn't be that dumb, bitch. You just want a threesome! CLAIRE: A threesome? I pick Bobby and Deputy! Claire winks at Bobby and Deputy, Bobby winks back, Deputy looks confused. TOM: Let's make teams. Claire, you go with Bobby and Deputy, but keep it clean. CLAIRE: Make no promises. TOM: Sister, you go with Mandy and Regina. MANDY: Do any of you bitches have cocaine? REGINA: I stick with power bars. TOM: Angela, you go with Nanette and Amy. NANETTE: Bitch, if I die I will swear to god. ANGELA: AND NOW TO THIS WEEK'S STORY, STARRING ME! AND NOT STARRING NANETTE MANOIRE. TOM: Crim, you go with Chelsea and Angelle. CRIM: Eww, ratchet hoes. ANGELLE: Chunelle Foara is bae. CHELSEA: But what about my Liam? TOM: Your Liam will be safe with me. Oh also Harley I guess. Liam bites his lip, without anyone seeing. Tom puts a flirty smile on his face. TOM: Well, let's investigate the house and see if we find clues. ''---TOM'S TEAM---'' Tom, Liam and Harley go to the living room. As they walk, Harley finds a bat, and protects herself with it. Tom sees a picture of Grace and him. ''---FLASHBACK---'' It was Tom's first interview for a job. He really needed this one, because of money issues. The good news of the interview was the owner was really rich. The bad news was the owner was supposedly Grace Gardner, one of the survivors of the tragic Kappa killings, then tried to be famous and have her own sitcom. It didn't work and now she lived in an isolated mansion. GRACE: Why should I hire you? TOM: Well, because I really need the-- GRACE: Cut the innocent act, you remind me of a young me, trying to be innocent and cute when really I knew about the Hester murders and I let her go on with-- TOM: Wait, what did you say? GRACE: What I mean is that cut the innocent bullshit, and tell me sincerely, why should I hire you. TOM: Well, because nobody likes you, and you are a sad bitch, I heard your butler killed himself because you were being so uninteresting, at least that's what the rumors AND his family say, your best friend pretty much became a doctor because you were acting so bitchy, probably like your shitty mom who didn't even want you, and that lead you to be one of the stupidest, lamest and most ignorant excuses for a front page on Forbes. Tom gasps after saying that. GRACE: Wow, I'm shocked. You are perfect for the job. When can you start? TOM: What the actual-- Fuck it, I can start right now. ''---END OF FLASHBACK---'' Tom's thoughts are interrupted by Liam. LIAM: Hey, you comin'? TOM: Sure... Be right there. TOM: So what's the deal with your girlfriend? LIAM: I don't really like talking about it. Maybe in another hour. TOM: Sure. So what was all that flirt about? LIAM: I have no idea what you are talking about. TOM: Sure you do. What about that lip biting? LIAM: Nothing... TOM: Sure about that... Douche? Tom grabs Liam's arm and they look deeply into their eyes. HARLEY: Could you stop with the Fifty Shades of Grey act? I found something. Harley leads them to a card from a house on Shady Lane to Grace Gardner. HARLEY (reading the letter):''' Hello, Grace Gardner. Yes, you idiot hooker, I found out where you live. With a bunch of nooping in on Google Maps and a bunch of blowjobs to fucking hackers, mailmen and probably perverts who pretend to know you, I found out your shitty isolated mansion in Beverly Hills. With this way, you are now informed to make a party at your mansion at night, and also invite every single poor person whose you have been blackmailing for your bath salts. That's right, I know that too. Also invite your staff, I want an awesome meal. You might not know who I am at that party, but let's just say, I will be there, fab as fuck. If you don't want things to turn out really bad for you, make this party. And make sure it will be one hell of a ride... when you still can. '''TOM: Who the fuck could have sent this? ''---ANGELA'S TEAM---'' Amy and Angela are trying to look for clues on the basement. Nanette is sitting on the couch with her iPhone. NANETTE: Ugh, I can't believe I went to this party instead of having another night of amazing sex with Johnny Abatti... He does it so well. But I do it bet-- ANGELA: Bitch what did you just say? NANETTE: I said I can't believe I went to this stupid party instead of fucking YOUR FUCKING FRIEND! ANGELA: Oh you stupid little stuck-up bitch! Angela and Nanette catfight. Amy licks the blood out of her Jordashes. AMY: It smells like fresh vagina out of you two horny bitches. Angela wins the fight. ANGELA: NOW GET THE FUCK OUT YOU BLONDE CHANEL REJECT! NANETTE: I hope the killer chops your head with an axe. AMY: Wow, so unoriginal bitch. Get your nasty vagina out of here, blonde hoe. Nanette gets out of the basement. While walking upstairs, she trips and falls to the ground. Then she sees someone dressed as the Red Cougar. NANETTE: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK! SOMEONE HELP! Nanette slaps the killer with her french shoes and runs upstairs, but as she runs, the killer picks up an axe and throws the axe into her back, killing her. Then he proceeds to turn off the lights and to run. Everyone runs to the basement and sees Nanette's dead body. TOM: Oh my fucking god, she's dead! SISTER: She's uglier when she's dead. I don't know how that's possible. CRIM: Same, to be honest. Crim and Sister high five. DEPUTY: My money's on Angela and Amy, they are both psycho bitches and it's really suspicious that you were both with Nanette when the murder happened. AMY: It wasn't me, it was definetly Angela. She was all mad when she find out Nanette was fucking her best friend. ANGELA: Even though I would be tempted to kill her, I didn't. Maybe it was you, trying to put the blame on me and SEEING HOW SHE WAS MURDERED WITH AN AXE... it's PRETTY suspicious. ANGELLE: What the fuck did you just say a coherent phrase? SISTER: What the fuck did you just spell right? My prayers worked. CHELSEA: Love, are you ok? Chelsea tries to kiss Liam but he rejects her. LIAM: Chelsea, shut up, there's a killer here and it's not the time to be fake. Chelsea slaps Liam. TOM: Let's hide the body in the basement, and call it a day! HARLEY: Wait, I'm not spending another day at this house! SISTER: Maybe you'll get lucky if you get killed, then you won't have to spend another day. HARLEY: I swear to god, bitch. SISTER: He has no ears for you, bitch. PART 2 Everyone prepares for bedtime. ''---TOM'S TEAM---'' Harley steals one of Grace's clothing. HARLEY: Even I have better clothing taste then this bitch. DOUCHE: Your outfits are rad tho. HARLEY: '''Bitch, I'm not Tom, I don't get my pussy wet just because someone complements me. '''DOUCHE: Bullshit. What about Puddin? Harley ignores Douche and goes to sleep on the couch. DOUCHE: Aren't you gonna sleep on the bed? HARLEY: I thought you and Tommy called dibs. I didn't know you were gay... Douche shuts Harley's mouth. DOUCHE: I'm not gay. I'm straight. HARLEY: Bitch, I'm not dumb or blind. I heard your little Anastasia/Christian shit right there. I find it cute. DOUCHE: Look, Tom is just... HARLEY: Look who's got a crush... DOUCHE: Oh really? I can still fuck girls, you know. HARLEY: Oh really? DOUCHE: Yes really. Harley and Douche are about to kiss, when Harley slaps him. HARLEY: You wish, bro. Harley starts sleeping. Douche kisses her on the cheek. TOM: Wow, guess you really deserve the title of Douche, I was unsure. DOUCHE: Oh c'mon, she's so pretty. Harley wakes up and gives the middle finger. HARLEY: How about you bitches fuck each other? Harley goes back to sleep. TOM: Well, you can sleep on the bed, I'll sleep on the ground. DOUCHE: No wait, you can sleep on the couch. HARLEY: UGH CAN YOU GUYS JUST FUCK AND LEAVE ME ALONE! Tom and Douche both sit on the couch, when they hear orgasms. DOUCHE: What the actual fuck... TOM: My money's on Claire. DOUCHE: '''Hey, I'm having trouble falling asleep, because of all the murder things. Can you tell me a story? '''TOM: What the fuck DOUCHE: I got it, the story of how you arrived here. TOM: That is a really sad story. DOUCHE: I promise if you tell me your story, I will tell you mine... someday. TOM: Okay sure. ''---FLASHBACK---'' Tom had been working for 5 months in Grace's house. The experience was not awful, he did get payed a lot, got to sleep in a mansion, and the other staff was really amazing, but Grace was really bitchy. But Tom could handle it, until one faithful night. Tom had come out to buy some groceries when he sees a bloody Grace laughing maniaclly, pointing a gun at him. TOM: '''WHAT THE FUCK! '''GRACE ''(putting the gun down)'': Sorry, for one second I thought you were the police. TOM: Where does all that blood come from? Grace leads him to a lifeless body of a girl. GRACE: '''She found out where I lived and that I knew about Hester being the killer... I had to do it! '''TOM: WHAT THE HELL GRACE?! I have to call the cops! GRACE: You won't bitch... TOM: Wait what? Did you just threaten me? GRACE: Yes, I did. See, I knew something like this would happen, I had a feeling. So I decided to blackmail you and I noticed you are also gay. I know you hired a gay hooker to your house, oh and the sex tape is HOT. I mean at his part, you are not even trying! TOM: How could you do something like this? GRACE: Oh, easy, I just putted a secret camera on your laptop. TOM: You little bitch. I hope you would have died in that Kappa accident. GRACE: Yeah, but I'm here, aren't I? ''---END OF FLASHBACK---'' TOM: And that's how the bitch kept me her for 3 years... I told you the story was--- Tom notices Douche sleeping. He looks at him confused, but then he gives him a goodnight kiss on the cheek. TOM: God you are so hot. HARLEY: Called it. ''---CLAIRE'S TEAM---'' Claire sucks Bobby's dick while Deputy fucks her. DEPUTY: This is hotter than when Amy tried to fuck me. BOBBY: This is hotter than when I tried to fuck Amy's body. CLAIRE: This is hotter than when I killed my ex. Now you two fuck. DEPUTY: What the fuck, no! BOBBY: '''No fucking way I'm touching his dick! '''CLAIRE: '''Oh c'mon guys, you are no fun. '''DEPUTY: Ok fine, but warning I'm not gonna enjoy it. BOBBY: Me neither. Bobby and Deputy start kissing and rubbing their cocks together. CLAIRE: Wow this is so hot. They continue. CLAIRE: Ok, time's up, now it's time to get back to your-- BOBBY: Bitch, shut the fuck up and go get us some oil. ''---SISTER'S TEAM---'' SISTER: Bitches, my goddess sense feels there is something in this bathroom. REGINA: '''Oh my fucking god, you perverts can you bitches get the fuck out of the bathroom while I'm pooping? '''MANDY: Look, it's bath salts. Not as good as cocaine but this will do. Both Sister and Mandy leave the bathroom. SISTER: Hey you, whoever you are. MANDY: I don't even know who I am right now, so yeah. SISTER: We should totes make a team to find out who the killer is. After all that cocaine shit, I sense a competetive spirit, something wanting to be free-- MANDY: What the fuck. Ok yeah sure, but only if you promise me to find all the hidden bath salts in the house. SISTER: You are the first sinner I like. MANDY: Are you sure you are not going to hell? ''---CRIM'S TEAM---'' CRIM: I can't believe I am stuck with you ratchet hoes. ANGELLE: Remind me whot teh fock? CRIM: Criminal. Mi nombre es Criminal. ANGELLE: wtf ore yau ivan soyin? CRIM: I'm saying I'm literally gonna-- ''---KITCHEN---'' AMY: Ugh, where the fuck is the oil? Amy turns around and sees the Red Cougar in front of her, turning off the lights. She screams. ''---CRIM'S TEAM---'' CRIM: Oh my god, who got murdered now? Crim hears a scream that wakes up everyone. Everyone goes to the kitchen and sees Amy stabbed repeatedly, and blood all over her and the kitchen. CRIM: Ok, I'm just gonna say it, I'm not gonna clean it! DEPUTY: Oh my god, finally! SISTER: Oh my lord, what the hell! REGINA: I know right, those were such fabulous Jordashes! TOM: Guys... I found out who the killer is! Tom points to the excited girl who's dancing to her own theme song. TOM: It was Angela Anaconda! Everyone gasps. BOBBY: I can't believe I missed an awesome sex for this bullshit. IT'S OBVIOUS SHE WAS THE KILLER IN THE FIRST PLACE! DEPUTY: Speaking about sex, where is Claire? A female scream is heard, echoing the walls. CRIM: Oh boy we are so fucked. Bobby winks at Deputy.Category:Episodes of "CLUEDO"